The Best Of Tinder 6/30/2014

ImageDoes photoshopping his goofy ass face onto the head of a dolphin get James laid? Part of me wants to say Yes. Bitches usually love dolphins. But do girls like goofy ugly ass faces? Probably not.

Bro, this isn’t Sea World. This is a dating site where you try and bang as many sluts as possible. You can’t be putting your ugly ass face on a dolphins body and expect girls to get wet.

 

Looks- 2 (The dolphin brings it up to a 2, other wise it would of been a solid zero.)
Personality- 8 (Kids a total goof in every way possible. Some girls are into that so ill give him that.)
Tinder game- 4 (Pretty sure this guy missed the whole point of Tinder. The goal is to try and get laid James. No one is getting laid with a face like that.)
Life score- 5

What do you guys think? Does this Tinder picture get our boy James laid?

By: Cmoney

Did Jaguars’ Owner Shahid Khan just Call Out Texas?

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Oh baby, football season right around the corner and Jaguars owner Shahid Khan is already calling Texas for being on their poor people shit. The billionaire owner put up this billboard in an apparent attempt to hype up the pussy cat Jags’ upcoming season. I respect the move and hate it at the same time. First off, you do realize your team sucks right? When your team is as much of a laughing stock as the Jaguars, pretty sure you should just keep your mouth shut and wait for them to produce something on the field before you call out an actual franchise like the Dallas Cowboys and their irrelevant little brother the Houston Texans.

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Shahid Khan has big plans for the team and It’s honestly pretty sick what he’s doing. Making pool side cabana’s in an NFL stadium is fucking dope. Marketing genius right there. I like how he’s going with the strategy of; If you build it, they will come.

Talking about sports a little more, I do like the direction the Jags are going. Cutting ties with their loose end, cap devouring, underperforming players like MJD and Jason Babin. Cutting Blaine Gabbert was also an excellent move in the right direction since he’s arguable a bigger bust than Ryan Leaf IMO. So good, out with the old, in with the new. They stacked up their receiving core by taking Allen Robinson and Marquise Lee in the draft which is also a good move. Drafting your future franchise QB, even better! Poor kid is going to need all the help he can get when he’s eventually thrown into the fire down there.

Personally I think the Jags are still at least 3 years away from being a legitimate playoff contender, but in the NFL it’s impossible to predict the outcome for any team until the season gets underway. With a new running back in town, new QB, new receivers that don’t abuse alcohol, and a defensive mastermind as a head coach, things are looking bright for the Jags future. Unfortunately for them it’s still not enough to get past the Texans or the Colts just yet.

 

By:SwaggyG

 

Does This Look Like The Face of an NBA Center Who Spiked a Volleyball in a Chicks Face?

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The face pretty much says it all; “Man, I need to try something new in my life”. So Greg Oden decided to take his talents to a different playing field this time around, the fine sport of beach volleyball. Strategic thinking on his end in all honesty. If you’re over 7″ and suck at Basketball, volleyball is the instant go to move. Using your height to your competitive advantage, the one smart thing this NBA bust has done in his life in the world of sport.

hmmm….

By: SwaggyG

The Best of Twitter 6/30/2014

NBA: NBA Draft

Fucking LOVE the move by Mike Dunleavy Sr here. This dude just skyrocketed up my favorite twitter accounts with that last tweet he sent out. It’s nice to see that white people can be funny on twitter too. Black dudes have been murdering the comedy game on twitter with the funniest shit you can possibly think of, oh no no bay, this day belongs to the whites.

It’s always a risky move comparing your 83 year old mother to the top overall pick in the NBA, especially when the sport is known for “fashion”. For example:

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This is a league for the swag elites. No poor people shit here, straight designer clothes or GTFO.

What’s worrisome for me is the safety for Dunleavy’s mother right now. Honest to god I hope this dude locked her up in his house for her own protection, pretty sure Andrew Wiggins is out to find her and most likely murder her by dunking her into a grave (too soon early?).

Hide yo kids, hide yo wife, hide yo grandmothers for god sake. THAT is what that kid was doing in high school.

The NBA by a fashion standpoint is starting to get out of hand in all actuality. As pointed out by Dunleavy Sr, Andrew Wiggins literally wore the same thing that is worn by an 83 year old woman, but because it’s the NBA, it’s straight fire flames swag. Unreal what this league has come down too.

By:SwaggyG

P.S. BONUS FOOTAGE FROM NBA INTERVIEWS. MUST WATCH.

Does This Look Like The Face of a Congressman Who Was Executed and Replaced By Robot Body Double?

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Gotta love politics right? Guys having their stuff research every nook and cranny of your entire life trying to find any sort of dirt on you in order to sway the publics opinion.

The case has the ultimate plot twist. It’s one thing to call out someone for smoking pot or for getting a DUI when he was raging face in college. Yeah, we get it, everyone fucks up here and there. NOPE. Not this time, this time Timmy Murray is sending shots at (allegedly dead) Frank Lucas.

“…it is widely known Rep. Frank D. Lucas is no longer alive and has been displayed by a look alike.” – Rep. Murray

“I’ve never been to Ukraine,” said Rep. Lucas.

It goes with no surprise that Lucas one the election. I mean c’mon people, who’d honestly believe that malarky? This isn’t iRobot, yes we have Will Smith to save the day, no we don’t have robots representing politicians trying to take over congress or whatever the fuck this election was for.

Lucas – 1
Frank- 0

Frank seriously needs to step his game up for the next election. Pretty sure that sap lost the election by over 70% of the overall vote. Do you even politics bro? Simple solution to solving the actual claim, cut him and see if he bleeds, pretty straight forward.

Bottom line these guys have no clue what the fuck they’re doing. Their negative press game is so far gone I’m pretty sure Drake is about to write a song about it. If you want to politics right take notes^^ That’s someone I’d vote for any day of the week.

 

By:SwaggyG

Does This Look Like The Face Of An Australian Rugby Player Kicked Off Team After Picture Of Him Pissing In His Own Mouth Went Viral?

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The Sydney Morning Herald

Cronulla Sharks five-eighth Todd Carney has reportedly been sacked by the NRL club after a photo of him engaging in a vulgar act in a hotel bathroom was widely circulated on social media but chief executive Steve Noyce is denying a decision has been reached.

The image, which is too graphic to publish and has yet to be authenticated, appears to show the Cronulla Sharks player urinating towards his mouth while standing at a urinal.

The photo is believed to have been taken in Sydney on Saturday night, not in Brisbane on Friday during the Sharks’ celebrations after their dramatic upset win over the Broncos, in which Carney starred. It is the latest incident to hurt Carney’s career, which has been marred by alcohol-related issues.

Normal athletes after they win a huge game usually celebrate by popping champagne and partying with teammates. Not Australian rugby players i guess. They celebrate by trying to pee in their own mouths and then posting it all over social media. Classy mother fuckers.
How the hell can you kick this hardo off your team? Rugby players are supposed to be fierce and feared. I wouldn’t wanna play against a guy that pees in his own mouth for fun. Terrible decision by the Cronulla Sharks kicking this guy off the team.
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By: Cmoney
Video

The Internet Craze Of Saying “Fuck Her Right In The Pussy” On Live TV Continues In Brazil

If you haven’t seen the first video (Have you been living under a rock?) here’s the original Fuck Her Right in the pussy video.

This Brazilian soccer fan needs to work on his delivery if he ever wants to be as good as the original legendary man. Say it with some more passion bro, say it like you mean it. Even his friend next to him is embarrassed doing a face palm after that poor effort.

Blonde reporter chick can get it.

By: Cmoney